I've studied now for about 18 months (off and on) various skills in hypnosis, brief therapies and similar. I've also spent some months as a trainee mechanic. However, I've felt that I've never really known what *success* would really mean to me.
I've never truly chased the *money* game or the status game. Or in fact any particular success badge. Yet, there is some emotional friction deep down when I think of the notion of becoming at least financially successful.
It feels like I'm able to find rationalisations to avoid nearly everything that could be seen as outside my comfort zone. This probably isn't the most concise or even tightly focussed post that you guys have read. I am sort of confessing that I feel that I need a little help, yet I'm unsure precisely where.
My partner feels that I've got no strong incentive to push myself, and he reckons that if he fell very ill, that would push me. I'd hate for that to be the only thing that would however, yet I think he has a point. Survival alone certainly didn't do it in the past.
If I had a magic wand to create anything in me, I'd create his form of deep, seemingly natural drive and commitment to something.
In the real world I have phases of somewhat obsessive studying behaviour, and not a lot more.
I'm not totally sure right now, what question/request I could use, in order to request help from another 3D Mind practitioner to get help sorting this more.
I will confess, I haven't made the best use of my own 3D Mind training-and intend to re-attend the seminars if and when they come to the UK again. I'll be setting out to make an early commitment on that so that funds don't be an issue!
Re: Excuses and *success*
Posted On Apr 1, 2007 at 8:20 AM
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eskills
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Joined: Jan 6, 2006 Last Visit: Nov 25, 2008 Posts: 14 e-Points: 8
"I've never truly chased the *money* game or the status game. Or in fact any particular success badge."
Look at all the presuppositions in that sentence.
Money has to be chased
Money is about status
Success is about a badge
In other words..money is a negative anchor for you. You associate it to people who chase status and wear it as a badge. You seem to not like those kinds of people.
On the other hand....you seem yo wear poverty proudly.
That is a little backwards.
So answer these questions
What does this excuse do for me?
How do I know when to use this excuse?
How you know when this excuse is no longer valid?
If I had to think of a different excuse what would it be?
What would happen if I couldn't think of an excuse?
What does this excuse insure that I will always have?
What does this excuse keep me from having?
Lets see what we find
Tom
Re: Excuses and *success*
Posted On Apr 1, 2007 at 2:29 PM
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karnautrahl
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Joined: Jun 5, 2006 Last Visit: Aug 29, 2008 Posts: 7 e-Points: 4
Whilst you may be accurate about the presuppositions, Tom, I don't think it's quite dead on about money being a negative anchor. At least not in itself.
As for wearing "poverty" proudly-Thats something off with my communication that night. Whilst I myself am not an earner, I cannot claim poverty either :-).
Well, I wouldn't go along with the idea that I don't like successful types actually-a few of my friends fit that bill.
The excuse about chasing money? I guess it relieves me of the urgency to go out and well, chase money somehow. There is a negative anchor about that, I feel it right now in fact. It's a mixture of feelings. Confusion, sweating, insecurity, uncertainity and a feeling of well, helplessness or "I haven't a friggin' clue how-though i ought to".
There is also a gap in having sufficient motive to sort it out I would say or as my partner would say, I've never had a strong enough reason to get off my butt and sort it out (and that was before I met him). So in the past I settled on the easiest option-the one that didn't stretch me.
How do I know when to use this excuse? Whenever the subject comes up, whenever I think about other people (like Kiyosaki) who are all out encouraging people to become "go-getters".
How do I know when this excuse is no longer valid? Hmm..difficult one that. When something comes along thats more important than my deep discomfort at the whole issue I guess.
If I had to think of a different excuse what would it be? I don't think I have the personality/wits/smarts/intense motivation required to be any sort of "go-getter.
What would happen if I couldn't think of an excuse? Nice confusion induction for me.
I don't know. I'd probably sit scratching my armpits looking puzzled whilst thinking of one!!! :-)
What does this excuse insure that I will always have? Security, minimal discomfort, going around in circles about the meaning of success...lack of any real fulfilment.
What does this excuse keep me from having? Lots of my "own" money for one. Experience of making myself successful in some area.
I do know I shy away automatically now from "entrepreneurial" projects and oppurtunities, bigtime. Yet three reality TV programs I enjoy (and enjoy predicting the outcomes of) are The Apprentice, Selling Yourself and The Dragons Den (all UK versions). I still wonder now when I see the Apprentice, how far I could get. However, I think back to my reality, and feel that I wouldn't do so great in business.
I've posted knowing, that somehow I either figure out an answer here, or I don't.
I'm grateful however, for the questions offered, that might help provoke me into finding those answers.
I do seem to be collecting books at a rate of knots. Currently reading Buying Trances and also an earlier book on hypnotic selling that is excellent at drawing together stuff I'd learnt before on hypnotic language. Your probably going to ask why sometime now LOL.
Re: Excuses and *success*
Posted On Apr 5, 2007 at 2:25 AM
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karnautrahl
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Joined: Jun 5, 2006 Last Visit: Aug 29, 2008 Posts: 7 e-Points: 4
Two things struck me this morning as I was working through a Kevin Hogan exercise on my dreams. I had thought I'd stopped having "impossible" dreams, but that was a fib to myself. I found about ten. Then I worked through to the barriers to each. Most of them came back to inner drive and losing focus.
I've cycled mentally through periods of decent concentration on a subject only to find inexplicably that concentration drifts, until my interest is at zero. The period of concentration can be a few hours, to a few months. When the zero interest hits, that too can be weeks or months. I've never found a way to stop this happening. So far.
So the top two obstacles were, not having inner drive-solid determination and sufficient consistent concentration to achieve results. Feeling unable, or perhaps more correctly thinking that I'm unable to come up with good ways to create the resources (money) to get what I want in life.
These two obstacles, may have other things in them, I'm still working through an exercise now. Right now they feel like the major ones. Depressing myself periodically, is partly just my playing "tapes" mentally about the lack of inner drive, ideas and ability to head for what I want.
I'd be interested to hear feedback from anyone else who's been through similar stuff-especially the ones who've gotten through it, around it or simply busted the whole thing open and moved on.
I'm 29 now, I feel that I have about 5 years to master some way(s) of creating wealth and I'm setting that as my standard (my partner retires in 5 years!!. So now, there is a time limit of my own choosing. This limit isn't just for when I sort it out though, I want to have sorted it and be well on the way to financial independence...and loving the process. One dream I wrote down, was to have work that I love doing-bad bits and all.
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. So now, there is a time limit of my own choosing. This limit isn't just for when I sort it out though, I want to have sorted it and be well on the way to financial independence...and loving the process. One dream I wrote down, was to have work that I love doing-bad bits and all.
